tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8257355798445271672024-03-12T21:36:04.971-07:00Thoughts of a Young ChristianEllahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-17409939984813272482009-05-28T18:20:00.000-07:002009-05-28T18:28:42.478-07:00What the Heart Can't ContainHave you ever been bothered by something so terribly, yet you do not pay much attention, perhaps because you think it's really irrelevant or that you've got other better things to think about rather than being consumed by negative feelings?<br /><br />And yet at the end of the day, that same thing that you've been trying to disregard becomes your last thought, and it still haunts you. Just as you thought it was nothing big, you begin to recognize something more than what it seems, something so disturbing that eats you up inside. And then finally in your aloneness, when you have disregarded your pride, you acknowledge that yes, this nonsense thing isn't really nonsense at all.<br /><br />When the heart can't contain this huge deal of burden, it needs a form of letting go. Most often than not, to another heart who's willing to listen, who can still understand between sobs, who doesn't judge, who stays by until you've yelled all you want and until you've cried your heart out.<br /><br />This amazing heart always comes knocking at your own stubbornness, saying "talk to me…" And when you’ve heed to this call, you'll have the most wonderful peace you never thought could still dominate your once burdened heart. You'll feel love so deep you'll wonder why you even tried to manage it on your own and why you hadn’t opened up before.<br /><br />When you think nobody would understand and that you've no one to talk to, He is never busy to listen. All He desires is that you pour yourself to Him and what your heart can't contain…He will carry it for you.<br /><br /><em>Just had such a great time with God last night. =)</em><br /><br /><div style="width:300px;"><object width="300" height="110"><param name="movie" value="http://media.imeem.com/m/NGe0ZT0ix6"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://media.imeem.com/m/NGe0ZT0ix6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="300" height="110" wmode="transparent"></embed></object><div style="background-color:#E6E6E6;padding:1px;"><div style="float:left;padding:4px 4px 0 0;"><a href="http://www.imeem.com/"><img src="http://www.imeem.com/embedsearch/E6E6E6/" border="0" /></a></div><form method="post" action="http://www.imeem.com/embedsearch/" style="margin:0;padding:0;"><input type="text" name="EmbedSearchBox" /><input type="submit" value="Search" style="font-size:12px;" /><div style="padding-top:3px;"><a href="http://www.imeem.com/ads/banneradclick.ashx?ep=0&ek=NGe0ZT0ix6" rel="nofollow"><img src="http://www.imeem.com/ads/bannerad/152/10/" border="0" /></a><a href="http://www.imeem.com/ads/banneradclick.ashx?ep=1&ek=NGe0ZT0ix6" rel="nofollow"><img src="http://www.imeem.com/ads/bannerad/153/10/" border="0" /></a><a href="http://www.imeem.com/ads/banneradclick.ashx?ep=2&ek=NGe0ZT0ix6" rel="nofollow"><img src="http://www.imeem.com/ads/bannerad/154/10/" border="0" /></a><a href="http://www.imeem.com/ads/banneradclick.ashx?ep=3&ek=NGe0ZT0ix6" rel="nofollow" ><img src="http://www.imeem.com/ads/bannerad/155/10/NGe0ZT0ix6/" border="0" /></a></div></form></div></div><br/><a href="http://www.imeem.com/emory-07/music/uGfL9IFM/ryan-holliday-he-will-carry-me-cover/">He Will Carry Me Cover - Ryan Holliday</a>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-14811778525360462862009-05-07T19:35:00.000-07:002009-05-07T18:49:40.221-07:00Questions on the Big Subject of Christianity<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKLEfxJSKdSgIVJhbcT46nNtVhL55NJU800-2rvvsw6oBmE9v7MfhoeEKXxbdglDmxZ4tSasnx6TD57Jjbg2mRIpBM6G3F-18RuLMbX3bggiQ50UJQ-Pl7y_96Ij1qNCJk8_rTzKV93HRC/s1600-h/Question_Mark.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5333243493233938674" style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 229px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 320px" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKLEfxJSKdSgIVJhbcT46nNtVhL55NJU800-2rvvsw6oBmE9v7MfhoeEKXxbdglDmxZ4tSasnx6TD57Jjbg2mRIpBM6G3F-18RuLMbX3bggiQ50UJQ-Pl7y_96Ij1qNCJk8_rTzKV93HRC/s320/Question_Mark.jpg" border="0" /></a>I have this attitude of wanting to be good in everything I decide to do. I want to know everything there is to know. I want to be prepared. So imagine my enthusiasm (Or maybe not. Sometimes my passion just lingers in my head) when I was discussing discipleship concerns with a few people from the church. (Shall I name names? Hehe.)<br /><br />I don’t want to go into the specifics of what we discussed about. But in general, we decided to focus first on establishing personal relationship with God, thus stressing out the importance of being rooted on God's word, prompting us to put BIBLE and PRAYER on the top list.I don’t know how I got into the path of over thinking (yet again) but after two planning sessions with them, somehow I arrived into this list:<br /><br />1. Why do you believe what you believe?<br />2. Why do you do the things that you do?<br />3. How do you develop a conviction on your faith, enough for you to be willing to die for your faith?<br />4. How can you make the personal truth of your salvation a general truth for all?<br />5. How can I prove the authenticity of the bible?<br /><br />Along the way I asked a couple of people questions related to this list and I got some answers. I was offered answers like “We don't reason. We have faith. It's not by our ways but by God's grace that we disciple people” and verses from the bible saying not to worry for the Holy Spirit will teach you at that time what you should say (Luke 12:11-12).<br /><br />To be honest, at that time, I never quite understood any of it. I was qualifying all my questions and assessing all the answers given to me. (Talk about being overly critical.)<br /><br />I was bothered. I was not satisfied, at least intellectually.<br /><br />Don't be hard on yourself. There are things we really can't explain. Guard your mind, I was told.<br /><br />Where do you go when you have troubling questions as these?<br /><br />I got into a conversation with God. I told Him I won’t back off until He gives me the answers. I read the Bible, pleaded for wisdom, and threatened Him that I wouldn’t sleep until I hear from Him.<br /><br />Without a doubt, He is found by all who seek him earnestly. Here is how the conversation went:<br /><br />Him: What are you thinking?<br />Me: Why do we disciple? Bible facts?<br />Him: Are you afraid that you might be asked something you don’t know how to answer?<br />Me: Uh…yes.<br />Him: Do you remember how you were saved?<br />Me: Yes!<br />Him: Did you have any questions when you accepted me as your Lord and Savior?<br />Me: No…I just believed…<br />Him: Look back at what I told you last night...<br /><br />Bingo!<br /><br />I had issues on the how’s and why’s of everything. Again, I have this attitude of wanting to be good in everything I decide to do. I want to know everything there is to know. I want to be prepared.<br /><br />But then again, I forgot that it’s not about me, nor my own capabilities, nor my own intellect. So that was what Psalms 3:5 meant. Trust me with all your heart and lean not on your understanding. Acknowledge me and I will make your paths straight.<br /><br />I passed by that verse, even wrote it in a post-it and stuck it on my bedroom wall. But it didn’t mean anything to me (although I felt it should) until I had that conversation with God.<br /><br />Christianity is never about us. Everything works to give glory to God and not credit to men. We don't change people. We don't make them believe. It is by God's grace. Now it makes sense.<br /><br />Do I want to be all planned up? All geared to disciple? I can never be. My own understanding can never equate His wisdom and His plans outweighs my own.<br /><br /><em>(Oh, did I not answer the questions above? This post is not meant to answer those. I got the answer I needed. And I am satisfied.)</em>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-20360983508083572742009-04-21T21:45:00.000-07:002009-04-21T21:51:11.027-07:00A Conversation with Satan<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:85%;">It must be past 12 midnight when I got up and felt I needed to drink. So I went down, robotically got myself a huge glass of water as I was still half-asleep, and headed back to my bed.<br /><br />I didn’t find it hard to get back to sleep. The moment I closed my eyes, I knew I already passed out. Now, the strange thing happened again. The heaviness I’ve been feeling occasionally in my sleep was there again. This must be exciting!<br /><br />But, no… it wasn’t! I waited for the gentle sounds I ought to hear again, but to my dismay, what appeared before me (at the left side of me, specifically) was a hideous, scary face with a devilish grin. Of course it was devilish. I realized it was him, Satan himself. <br /><br />He was definitely scary and he was undoubtedly luring me with his lies. His face was so vivid I cannot put into words how he looked like. I cannot quite identify the exact things he said because I didn’t want to pay attention. Besides, it was not as if he were saying anything worth listening to. All I remember is that I had the feeling that he was somehow saying that my efforts are futile and that there is no point to battle with him any longer for he is already reigning. And he kept on laughing at me with mockery!<br /><br />I must admit I was terrified. Sure I was. He was right in front of me and I couldn’t move! But I didn’t want to give him that satisfaction. (Even now he must feel like a celebrity for me to write about him. You are not, so be disappointed.) I instantly cried out to God for help and I knew He was right there with me. He is really good and faithful. I knew He wouldn’t allow me to be defeated in that encounter. I knew He wouldn’t allow any of Satan’s deception sink into me. And by God’s amazing grace, I yelled at Satan: How dare you say you reign? From the very beginning, you have already lost!<br /><br />Moments later, he disappeared and I got my precious sleep back.<br /><br />(That was the second time he tried invading me at my sleep and both times, he failed.)<br /><br />We might not encounter Satan face to face, but we are waging war1 against him daily- in our thoughts, our behavior, our decisions, the choices we make, in our dealings with other people, in our quiet time- in every aspect every moment of our life. 2 He will not stop trying to intimidate us and to deceive us until we consider that his arguments make sense and soon believe that he is right. And if we are not grounded on our faith, we will definitely fall in his trap.<br /><br />Should we be afraid? Definitely not. He is simply a roaring lion, and as children of the King of kings and Lord of lords, our Almighty and all powerful God, Satan has no longer power in us.3 We are already victorious through Jesus!<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:85%;">If he keeps on insisting that he is greater than us, we ought to remind him of his destination. (Revelations 12:10)<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:85%;">Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:85%;">Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Christ. For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;font-size:85%;">Maybe he just missed that tiny, yet very powerful, detail.<br /><br />1 – Ephesians 6:12 – For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.<br /><br />2 – 1Peter 5:8 – Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.<br /><br />3 – Hebrews 2:14-15 – Since the children have flesh and blood, he too shared in their humanity so that by his death, he might destroy him who holds the power of death – that is the devil and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.</span><br /><span style="font-family:Trebuchet MS;font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-family:Trebuchet MS;"><span style="font-size:85%;">I've seen a </span><a href="http://franklinchurchofchrist.com/sermons/date/2008/htm/20080706AM.htm"><span style="font-size:85%;">link</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> that is helpful. You may want to take a look. =)</span></span>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-52132338355407991322009-03-22T06:13:00.000-07:002009-03-31T00:13:22.770-07:00SuperficialBeing Christians makes us specimens under a microscope.<br /><br />(1 Cor. 4:9 - <em>For it seems to me that God has put us apostles on display at the end of the procession, like men condemned to die in the arena. We have been made a spectacle to the whole universe, to angels as well as to men.</em> NIV)<br /><br /><br />If I may just repeat in bold letters, <strong>we have been made spectacle to the whole universe. </strong>(Imagine that? A SPECTACLE TO THE WHOLE UNIVERSE!) I guess that's primarily the reason why most of us wear church masks in front of people so as to define ourselves with the rest. After all, people watch every move, every word, every reaction. Christians are expected to behave in a very crucial godly way.<br /><br /><br /><ol><li>We go to church. <em>Of course it's a must.</em></li><li>We pray. <em>Oh, how we close our eyes and bow our heads with everyone else in earnest prayer!</em></li><li>We guard our tongues. <em>We can't speak bad words! But what's going on in our head?</em></li><li>We say faith-filled words. <em>God is my healer! God will provide! God has a plan for us, to prosper us and not to harm us! Music to the ears of many, eh?</em><br /></li></ol><br />When we say something, it does not necessarily follow that we believe in it a full 100%. Most often than not, people say something out loud not to express conviction but to convince themselves on its truth and validity.<br /><br />I hear people in a deep mess saying these to encourage themselves. But sometimes we ought to ask, <em>Do we really believe in what we're saying? </em>Sometimes it gets too overrated that it loses its impact to change our lives.<em> </em>Some even say these bible-based encouragements and quote verses from the bible just to look spiritual, or to make themselves look holier than thou.<br /><br />We can seem to be the "ideal Christians" and the entire universe may adore us on how we behave, but still, the genuineness of our hearts remain to be the main indicator of who we really are. Are we putting up a show? Are we just trying to fit in? Is our faith merely on a superficial level?<br /><br />At the end of it all, it's only between us and God.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-87041565068419919012009-03-19T23:35:00.000-07:002009-03-20T00:54:36.180-07:00A Martha or A Mary?<span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="color:#333333;"><em>Reference: John 11:21-33 "Jesus Resurrected Lazarus" </em>A must-read.</span><br /><span style="color:#333333;"></span><br /><span style="color:#333333;">This is a late post.</span><br /><span style="color:#333333;"></span><br /><span style="color:#333333;">I was privileged to have attended a talk about prayer led by Ms. Mary Malinao. (Not the Mary I am referring to here). In this very popular story in the bible, it is amazing how God could be speaking more than just resurrecting Lazarus from the dead. When Jesus arrived to Judea, long after Lazarus was gone, Martha and Mary approached Jesus and said the same thing: <em>"Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died."</em> But there was a greater impact in Mary's encounter than in Martha's.</span><br /><span style="color:#333333;"></span><br /><span style="color:#333333;">Why?</span><br /><span style="color:#333333;"></span><br /><span style="color:#333333;">It's not because Jesus loved Mary more or that he listened to Mary's request more than Martha's. Nor is it because Jesus and Mary had a relationship (just like most people believed in after reading Da Vinci code).</span><br /><span style="color:#333333;"></span><br /><span style="color:#333333;">Martha approached Jesus in a theological point of view. </span><br /></span><ul><li><span style="font-size:85%;color:#333333;">She knew and believed that Jesus is the Son of God. <em>That's basic but still a good point.</em> </span></li><li><span style="color:#333333;"><span style="font-size:85%;">She knew and believed that Jesus can do anything. <em>Certainly. He had calmed the storm, fed thousands of people, healed the sick. And ultimately died for the forgiveness of our sins. What else can he not do?</em></span></span></li></ul><p><span style="font-size:85%;color:#333333;">But when Jesus revealed himself as the resurrection and the life, Martha missed that very rare opporunity to witness God's power. She simply said, <em>Yeah Lord, I know it right? </em>She knew Jesus is capable of making all things possible, but she didn't understand that in front of her was the God, the resurrection and the life, who could prove it right there and then. Only, she didn't ask.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;"></span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;color:#333333;">On the other hand, Mary upon seeing Jesus, immediately fell at his feet. And Jesus was deeply moved. Mary approached him in a relational way.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;"></span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;color:#333333;">Most of us have or try to gain a good head knowledge of who God is and the immensity of his power. Like Martha, we know the wonders he has done and we believe in his might and authority over everything. Yet, we fail to approach him as a Father listening to his child</span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;"></span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;color:#333333;">Faith is more than just believing, because Satan also believed there is a God. It takes a deeper understanding than that. More than memorizing the bible, more than knowing all the miracles Jesus did, we are called to seek God with no pretension. Can God turn his back to a child calling out on his name?</span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;"></span></p><p><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="color:#333333;">We see God as someone distant, sitting on his throne far far away, guarded by a million of angels. We doubt if we are heard, or if we are important enough to pay attention to. But in this story, Jesus revealed himself as a God simply waiting for us to ask. He longs for us to have fellowship with him. He longs for us to know him not like how we may know the prominent people of this world through their biography, but through a personal encounter with him.</span><br /><span style="color:#333333;"></span><br /><span style="color:#333333;">The bible tells us different description and stories of God, but only through a relationship with him that any of it will become real in our life.</span></span></p>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-32020659534331153682009-02-18T20:21:00.000-08:002009-02-20T18:08:39.372-08:00With a SwordMatthew 10:34 "Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. "<br /><br />Now, that's something different. We've always thought of God as a God of love and compassion. We've always taken him for granted, thinking that he'd always understand. We sin and say sorry and think that everything is all right.<br /><br />When I read this verse, I was shakened. I have to say I am guilty of fooling myself with the thought that God's forgiveness is always ready and available. Sadly, that's what makes us relaxed in dealing with things. We are easily swayed by the concerns of this life that we fail to stay right on track. We tend to think that it's ok to do this now, I'll just confess later. <br /><br />But with this verse, another character of God is manifested. Although it still holds true that God is forgiving, he said that he comes with a sword. We can never mock God nor can we play him on the palm of our hands. He knows our hearts and our deepest motives whether or not we admit it to ourselves. We can never hide anything from him. <br /><br />However we can always be confident that he loves us no matter what, we must also bear in mind that God is just. He does not condone evil nor he lets go of a sin unpunished. It is a great reminder to us Christians to take our walk with God seriously, now that we still have time.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-35206821061112813242009-02-17T18:35:00.000-08:002009-02-17T19:02:09.035-08:00A Choice on VdayI know this may be too delayed already for my Valentine's entry. But it doesn't mean I can't write about it anymore, right?<br /><br />I was excited for the party I was supposed to attend on Vday. It was themed "True Love Waits." It was a party organized by our church intended for the youth. You know how these young people get to be too impulsive when it comes to love. They always think that this person is the one! I should know right? I've been there. I know I'm no longer considered part of the youth but I'm part of the emerging leaders for this group. <br /><br />After work, I headed back home to have lunch with my dad before I take off to the party. Unfortunately, my dad was not feeling well. I was very reluctant to leave. My dad's my number one critic on my new-found faith and if I decided to leave, that would make it harder for both of us to remain in good terms when it comes to my relationship with God. <br /><br />But as much as I wanted to go to the party, I had to make a choice. So I called my friend and told her I wouldn't be able to join them anymore. I couldn't bear leaving my dad sick at home while I and my brother were out celebrating valentines' day. So I remained at home and satisfied myself with watching DVD of Twilight and Heroes.<br /><br />Most of the time, if I want something, I am so stubborn and selfish to get what I want. Had it been years before, I would've gone for that party without even considering my dad's condition, thinking that there's nothing else I could do. He locked himself at his room anyway. But as I continue to know God more, I know that even the littlest of my actions matter. In that very simple way, forgetting about the fun of the party even if I was ecstatic about it just the night before, and staying with my dad, I knew I've made him feel loved and it's a choice I'd never regret. It's more fun to give out of love than to get something out of personal reasons.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-6507768244530670642009-02-08T22:40:00.000-08:002009-03-24T22:10:58.825-07:00Near-Death or Dream?3 am. I was awakened by my one-month old niece's cry. I share the same room with her and her mom. Instead of being annoyed, I couldn't help myself laughing at the sound of the baby's cry as if she were crying her heart out, pleading for someone (my sister) to give her some milk.<br /><br />As I had already lost my peace in sleeping, I decided to listen to my ipod: Book of Revelation. I set the sleep timer after 15 minutes trusting that it would not take me longer than that to fall asleep. But I guess listening at that last book of the New Testament at around 3 am was too far from hearing a lullaby, as I kept turning my ipod on after every 15-minute sleep and ended up listening to the entire 22 chapters.<br /><br />It was my first time to hear Revelation even if I've always been curious about it. I don't know if it was a good idea to have had it heard, rather than read straight from the bible. I have to tell you honestly, it was scary. What would happen on the great tribulation is nothing petty. Just thinking about it makes me tremble with fear. How much more having those thoughts at 3am when the baby had already stopped crying and feeling that anything can happen any minute?<br /><br />The thought of heaven and hell was the last thing on my mind while I was trying to get back to sleep. I was trying to figure out how heaven looks like and how miserable people would be in hell after the judgment day when I felt something heavy on me. I felt myself starting to detach from my own body, slowly floating in the air. I thought I was having a nightmare, but I figured it was different. It was not as if I couldn't move like how I've had my nightmares before. I just felt myself floating.<br /><br />At first I panicked, thinking that it may be the rapture just as it was said in the bible. I was afraid. Death scares me, especially when it isn't my own death I'm talking about. But I realized, life after death is even more frightening when you're not certain if you will experience eternal glory with God or eternal sufferings and pain on endless fire. Am I going to heaven? The thought of the possibility of me going to hell was just so terrifying. I know I have accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior, but He remains to be the judge.<br /><br />While consumed by my worries in mid-air, I suddenly heard sounds of trumpets. It was gentle, calming, and welcoming. I began to be at peace and wondered if it were heaven calling me. I know it sounds weird but instantly, the fear of death escaped me and I said, if it's time then I'd be glad to go.<br /><br />Then, I woke up at my alarm at 5am.<br /><br />I don't know if it were just a byproduct of hearing the book of Revelation or a mere imagination on my sleep. I'm not even sure if it were just a dream or was it a reminder of the truth of what God has spoken of hundreds of years ago?<br /><br />I've always believed in heaven. But that welcoming sounds of trumpet, whether or not it was just a dream confirmed in my innermost being that heaven does exist.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-80350556855269000902009-02-03T19:47:00.000-08:002009-02-04T00:14:02.446-08:00When others seem to get more favors easilyThere are some people who don’t have to ask, more so to plead in order to get favors. They just have this irresistible charm that you just cannot say no to. Oftentimes, you go the extra mile just to give them whatever they request from you.<br /><br />I don’t usually ask for favors, afraid that I might be turned down. I’m not used to give others burden by my requests. And I used to envy those people bold enough to just give you a smile and you’d gladly extend a hand.<br /><br />I heard a message from somebody I look up to, saying everywhere she goes, God’s favor is upon her. I was one of those people whose initial reaction was ‘God must favor you more than others because you’re a bible study teacher.’<br /><br />But I realized I was wrong.<br /><br />Romans 3:29 says “Is God the God of Jews only? Is he not the God of the Gentiles too? Yes, of Gentiles too, since there is only one God…”<br /><br />If God can pour others immeasurable blessings, He can give it to anyone. He is not a God of a few, but a God of all. What He can do to one, He can do it for you.<br /><br />She believed for millions-worth of house and God built it for her. She believed for big business transactions and God provided for her. She believed for healing and God was faithful to heal her.<br /><br />God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. His promises stand the test of time. His favors are already spoken, just waiting to be claimed. We only need to believe that our God is faithful to shower us blessings that we could never imagine.<br /><br />I never realized His favors in my life, even the littlest one, until I was told that. I used to say that God can do everything but in my heart I had shameful doubts of whether He would truly grant my prayers. I used to say that I trust Him, but I never really believed that until now.<br /><br />I am not to envy anyone else anymore because I am now firm that I need not plead my case with God. He always listens. It’s never a burden for Him. He is always ready to open the gates of heaven for abundance of blessing.<br /><br />We are irresistible to God. All we have to do is to believe that He is able.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-88292695075273640572009-02-02T00:20:00.000-08:002009-02-02T00:21:41.231-08:00When it isn't about you this time<p>Who isn’t thinking of becoming successful, being happy or getting the best in this life?</p><p>Do we not wake up in the morning preoccupied on running our life and making the most of it?</p><p>Do we not sometimes look at people thinking what can we possibly get from this person? Is he an asset or liability to my race?</p><p>Or even as we walk the streets, do we not think that all eyes are on us and we’re being watched by the world?</p><p>Do we not want to get recognition for every little thing that we do? Do we not mimic a child saying “hey dad! watch me! watch what i can do!”</p><p>Talk about being self-absorbed.</p><p>We are so consumed by ourselves that we sometimes think that the world has to stop and care for us, to listen and give us what we want.</p><p>Do we not like those people or guys (he he sorry) who just love to talk about their curriculum vitae and enumerate all their accomplishments, then give you 5 seconds to comment an “ah” or “ok” or maybe applaud? then continue rambling?</p><p>The ‘me-attitude’ is always not the best option.</p><p>In life, I think the more we focus on ourselves, the more we find that too much is lacking. Sometimes, when we shift our focus from ourselves, to what we can do for others, it’s where we find true fulfillment.</p><p>I’ve read a book once saying our own comfort comes when we give comfort to others. Financial sufficiency comes from sparing some of our own for others. It’s hard to understand but it works.</p><p>Most of the time, there are far greater things in this world than our own. And since we are concentrated with our own little world, we neglect to recognize our responsibility with other people and yes I believe we have.</p><p>Sometimes, it isn’t just about us anymore.</p>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-13213070518281099032009-01-23T18:51:00.000-08:002009-02-04T00:07:28.378-08:00When She PrayedMy admin employees were in chaos for the past 2 weeks, I guess, as we've been terribly busy. It's a good thing that our production is at it's peak. Talk about renewal of business permits, and people just keep coming in.<br /><br /><br /><br />They say that the true character of a person is manifested when he's stressed or under pressure. I'm also guilty of being improper when I'm tired. When my staff asks me practically everything, when they throw on me all the unresolved problems of clients, and when they give me the last say on every decision to be made, I just transform into a green-eyed monster for a moment.<br /><br /><br /><br />Of course after my outburst, I'd realize my mistake. There was even one time that I gathered them all together to apologize for my misbehaviors. Some business owners would advice that I don't get to excuse any decisions I make or anything I want to say or when I should say it. But I feel otherwise. I also deal with human beings whom I may have caused emotional trauma because of my own emotional instability. I don't think admitting mistakes would make me less of a person or a boss for that matter.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, maybe I have passed on my panic and distress to my staffs. For over a week now, when bulk of transactions come in, I just feel no harmony in the office. They get irritated with each other easily and they blame each other for petty mistakes. I couldn't stand hearing them not getting along well (at my watch!).<br /><br /><br /><br />I intended to talk with them and settle whatever misunderstandings they have. But just this morning, I was really amazed when one of my staffs approached me and told me that everything was already settled among them. Apparently, she prayed about it last night and instantly, she received a message from her co-employee apologizing for her behavior. What a fast answer was that!<br /><br />I was thinking, I never thought of praying about it! I was so overwhelmed by too much distraction at work and I never even thought of praying about it! Did I think I could handle it myself? Did I think it was too petty to ask?<br /><br />Even that tiny little detail of her existence, and she prayed about it! I seldom do that. I got too focused on my busyness and when she prayed, I felt it was as if I were called to be more in tune with God.<br /><br />Just a realization.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-15801939954590677162008-09-22T22:10:00.000-07:002009-02-04T00:08:11.350-08:00the list i have yet to finish<p>For over 4 years, I have been bugged by one question over and over again. I thought I was going crazy for finding no satisfaction in all the time I spent for my thought life seeking to find the answer. I’ve read all the books. I’ve asked for all possible help. I’ve compared notes with my friends. Still, I was left with no concrete answer. </p><p>The Purpose-Driven Life became a best-seller because Rick Warren was able to successfully spot the one question that everybody has subconsciously been asking all their life- What is life’s purpose? </p><p>In one of my quest for the answer, a wonderful revelation was made known to me a few months back. I realized that finding the true meaning of existence is not of this world. I was able to understand that nothing in this world can truly satisfy that strange longing in our life…that after earning all the accomplishments this world has to offer which should’ve made us feel that it was enough, still we end up wondering what else is missing. </p><p>I was over step one. I was able to draw the big picture out of this search. If it’s not our job, relationships, our bank account or collection of travel pictures, I began to zoom in the specific- what is that very thing that we are all searching for. I used to envy those people who seem to have a definite purpose in life, who live each day as if they knew exactly what they are meant for. I began to imitate their source of happiness. </p><p>I was jealous of those overly confident people who could win any argument by mere intimidation. I was jealous of those who had a wide perspective in running businesses that innovations just seem to pop in the middle of the night. I was jealous of those who seem to know it all and are able to impose their point of view on other people. I wanted to become like them, so I dreamed to do things that would make me like them. </p><p>None of my efforts paid off. None of my plans materialized. I was on the verge of frustration of wanting to do everything and yet not knowing where to start. During one of my daily meetings with myself, I asked God just one request. I asked Him to show me a direction on where I should head. I asked for an opportunity to do that very thing that would define my purpose in life in a way that’s delightful in His eyes. </p><p>As faithful as He’s always been, He answered clearly. Imagine how you were confused as a child on why huge ships do not sink into the sea but a tossed coin does. Then all the concepts of buoyancy etc. were explained and we just couldn’t hide our amazement. I could’ve picked a better analogy but my point is there was a clear, unmistakable answer that was given to me that left me gasp in astonishment. </p><p>I was offered a writing position. I was not even expecting that answer. In fact, I was looking forward to a teaching job at a university. Writing was just a hobby and an outlet of thoughts I never seem to run out of. You can just imagine my disbelief when I was told of the answer. It was laid out to me plain and simple. No room for having second thoughts. No room for debates. </p><p>I was ecstatic! It was as if I asked my dad for a red car for my birthday and he gave me the exact red car I asked for right there and then! (How I wish) I never thought writing could possibly be more than just a hobby. </p><p>Now, I’ve got a new list of plans but this time I am prepared to put a check mark on every single step. </p><p>To God be the glory.</p>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-57395668005237041702008-08-10T03:05:00.000-07:002009-02-04T00:08:17.716-08:00THE GRIPIt was strong. It was blinding. And before I knew it, it was swallowing me whole. I once read that the pain it caused was like trying to put together a broken glass- it leaves you bleeding trying despite the glaring truth that it cannot be fixed at all.<br /><br />I found myself being slowly broken into a million pieces. I cried countless times. I wished repetitively on every first star I saw at night on how much I wanted to bring back everything the way it was. But there was as if a mighty opposing force that allowed me to be totally devastated…and lost…and be in such a pathetic state.<br /><br />It was so intense that I thought I could not get free from it. It was short, yet it left a seemingly lasting mark. Starting all over again was a distant idea that seemed untranslatable into reality.<br /><br />I was told I could get over it and that it would all get better in time. And in my heart I wished the same. I was thinking, sure I’m smart and I’m capable of doing a million things. I’ve got a lot of friends who would back me up in desperate times. And so as the years passed, I tried to live with the few pieces of me that were left.<br /><br />Those pieces were exposed to a huge deal of opportunities to be fused back together and even to multiply and be whole again. I am grateful for every chance I got to learn how to be matured enough to handle myself not just in my profession but more importantly in my inmost being.<br /><br />From a self-engrossed person who cared only about my own hurts and bitterness about how the world betrayed me, I was called to do greater and more meaningful things. That mighty opposing force who seemed to have dumped me into that pit was also the same force who faithfully led me into a life I never tasted before.<br /><br />Looking back I realized a very important truth in my life. The grip of that relationship, the very thing that I once embraced with all my heart, was also the very thing that held me back from becoming the person I am designed to be. And I never imagined I am much more than what the past had instilled in me.<br /><br />It was never fun having to endure the pains of the past. Had nobody even cared to take me out of there, I would’ve been locked into nothingness. But somebody did care. Somebody poured out his love for me without question…without condition. Somebody showed me the brilliance of the future. That was the hope I learned to hold on to, the most wonderful gift that had finally set me free.Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-72811026619806394422008-04-26T11:06:00.000-07:002009-02-01T23:36:49.578-08:00Changing Lanes<a href="http://i441.photobucket.com/albums/qq140/laelsan/road.jpg"><img style="FLOAT: right; MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 241px" alt="" src="http://i441.photobucket.com/albums/qq140/laelsan/road.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div><br /><div>In my head, I found myself driving on a single lane, easy road at approximately 40 miles per hour, satisfied at my rate, well-buckled on my seat, comfortable at the sounds of my stereo. I had a content smile on my face saying “This is what I call life.”<br /><br />I came to a busy street with horns honking everywhere, intersections blocked by cars trying to beat the red light, and each vehicle trying to make a way for itself. Naturally, my moment of ease was disturbed. For a moment, I was preoccupied with the traffic. I forgot the comfort I was feeling a few minutes ago, and I busied myself with what was actually there, with what was in front of me. At a red light, I compared my car to all those that are in the same lane, leaving brief comments on each I envied as well as on others I felt I was better off. When it turned green, I never gave any other car a chance to get into my way.<br /><br />Traffics are always a headache. After a few times of cursing to the pedestrians who were still crossing the street at my green light, and after almost hitting the bumper of the car in front of me just to not let anybody else get ahead of me, I got weary and wanted to get out of the main road. So I turned right, went straight ahead, and made a couple of U-turns just to find an easy way to get out of it. Having no sense of direction, it took me a little more while to find a clearer road.<br /><br />I found myself in the middle of the same road I was on before. Coupled with frustration, I fled. Time and again, I was able to unbelievably overtake a few trucks, and to avoid some hollows on the road under repair that I used to never miss. I was filled with pride that I was able to exceed my limits in driving. It was another adventure for me.<br /><br />Yet, after the fun, I slowly became bored. I found nothing challenging anymore. I became uneasy with my speed so I slowed down a bit. Lost in my thoughts, a question popped. Where was I heading? Consumed by panic and fear, I realized a truth: I was heading nowhere. I looked outside my window to check how long I have travelled with no precise destination. I checked on my rearview mirror to see if there were any other vehicles running on the same road.<br /><br />So I decided to pull over. A few cars, including a patrol, checked on me if I had a problem. At the back of my mind, I was asking, “Could you give me a road map?” But I didn’t want them to know I was lost. So I just pretended I was taking a break for a long trip ahead. Anyway, it was partly true.<br /><br />It was already mid-afternoon. Still unsure as I was, I decided to get on with my ride. I drove at an acceptable speed. Seeing the fire trees that started to bloom that season, I began to relax. My worries passed and peace wrapped me. I enjoyed the solitude.<br /><br />Throughout that long day, I realized, it’s not with the comfort, it’s not with the ability to get away with traffic, it’s not with the speed, nor is it with the ability to get ahead. A worthwhile ride is about being able to enjoy and appreciate every part of it, driving not too fast and not too slow, and still fully understanding where you’re going.<br /><br />And now at the end of the day, the same question popped: Where was I heading? This time I smiled. I was heading back home.<br /><br />It’s always reassuring to know that after my road trips, there would always be Him taking me home.</div></div>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-70392792907285248962008-01-19T22:39:00.000-08:002009-02-01T23:36:49.578-08:00The Answer<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">It was a difficult day. <br /><br /><strong><em><u>The Questions:<br /></u></em></strong><br /><em>Her phone alarmed at 6:05am. She automatically turned it off, and curled underneath her blanket. Another day, she thought. Only if she could make up excuses for not going to work, she would’ve probably slept the whole day. But she knew she had to get up and drag herself to shower. Can it be like this forever?<br /><br />Almost 10 hours of the day, she had to deal with her job, which failed to engross her lately. She had to tire out herself “finding money,” as she put it. She knew sales was not her forte. Dealing with tough clients wasn’t already interesting, but draining. She tried to search for the enthusiasm she once had. Is this the career path she had in mind?<br /><br />At home, she hardly saw her dad. They hadn’t talked for nearly 3 months. Not about work, not about what’s happening, not about anything at all. Where did her control-freak dad go?<br /><br />She remembered how angry he was for not being able to impose what he wanted in her life. And she, herself, got mad at him for not accepting that not everything in her life could be manipulated by his plans, or at least what he believed was right for her. And they argued for 3 minutes or so, and fell silent for 3 months. Why can’t he understand?<br /><br />She had remaining 3 to 4 hours before she would go back to bed. She had a few options on how to spend ‘em. <br /><br />Watch TV. Maybe Tyra would feature some anorexic 5’11” women wanting to be 80lbs. Then she’d feel some people were more ridiculous than her. Can’t people find any contentment at all?<br /><br />Chat with friends. That would divert her spotlight away from her own self. Would they have any other interesting things to say? Or would they be sensitive enough to hear what she had to say?<br /><br />Dinner. She’d still have to figure out if this would add up to the free radicals in her body or if her liver won’t be overloaded. Is this healthy or toxic?<br /><br />Read. She got all those halfway-read newly-purchased books piled up on her nightstand waiting for her to start living with the principles of maximizing time, heading towards success, and unleashing innermost capabilities. Yeah, the ideas were great. But why don’t they suffice?<br /><br />She had the usual questions a normal 23-year old would have. (That’s insanity aside.) Life starts to become a burden, not an enjoyable thing. A day passes without any difference from the previous day and a voice within her keeps on whispering that life couldn’t be just like that. Living is supposed to be a short, yet exciting and wonderful experience you can’t wait to taste; not a dreadful, boring journey on a tunnel wherein seeing the end of it is your only goal.<br /><br />She satisfied herself with a book that had been with her for months but she felt too exhausted to even consider opening. It struck her with its promises to answer life’s toughest questions. Really, huh? Now there’s such a thing as a universal answer to all the questions she had in mind. Intrigued, she leafed through it.<br /><br />Upon recovery from the state of shock after reading, the reality flashed to her as if wondering why she was surprised with the answer she got. She had always tried to find some meaning in her life and a sense of purpose for her existence but instead she found herself facing the same “difficult days”, doing the same things. Little did she know that all this time, she got it all wrong.<br /></em><br /><strong><u><em>The Answer<br /></em></u></strong><br />There’s a huge difference between existing and actually living. To exist is to breathe, to move even the most futile movement, and to be able to stay alive, even if it meant a machine is keeping your vital organs at work. To exist is to drift in this world with no purpose.<br /><br />On the contrary, to live is to understand that you are tailored to a more meaningful existence. It is knowing what makes you special and what you’re supposed to do to make use of the gifts given to you.<br /><br />To live is not self-serving. You may have acquired all the riches in the world, won all the trophies of success and yet come home after the most victorious event feeling empty, alone, and strangely senseless.<br /><br />If you cease to find the purpose of your existence, you cease to exist. Like a wave just going with the flow of others, not knowing its destiny, it seems that it’s meant to only crash in the shore. But the truth is, even how long the journey is and how hard the crash must be, even a tiny wave it is, it’s designed to still go back to the where it belongs – the ocean.<br /><br />How then do you define the answers to all these seemingly endless questions on the depth of life’s meaning?<br /><br /><em>She had kept herself captive of doubts and weariness with her life. She’d been trying to figure out if she’s only meant to crash in the shore. But then it struck her that she’d been searching on the wrong places. <br /><br />Is she meant to crash in the shore, she wondered. And the answer shone on her like the sun’s rays in the morning sky. She is designed to go back to where she belongs. She is destined to carry out the master plan of the one who made her.<br /></em><br />When you remember where you came from, it is easier for you to figure out where you’re heading. When you understand that you’re not just a single wave, but a part of the bigger ocean, it is already laid out to you what you need to prioritize. When you realize that you are not the steward of your own life, but mere clay molded by the Potter’s hand, it is natural for you to let go and allow the Maker to take control of your steering wheel.<br /><br />Most of the time we trouble ourselves with every detail in our life, believing that they are the truly essential things that would keep us going- dreams, security, stability, health, relationships. But the question remained, to keep us going where? Is fulfilling a dream the end goal? Would having uncountable wealth satisfy our deepest longing? Would living up to a hundred years make us feel we have made sense on earth?<br /><br />Only through the proper perspective in life we can truly decode what it is to live. And the perspective does not come from our own expertise; rather it comes from the wisdom of the Most High who is all-knowing. We keep our eyes on what’s material, on what’s physical, but He knows what is truly essential, what is eternal. If we know how to align the journey of our life with His master plan, the drifting comes to an end, and the living begins.<br /><br />Searching for His ultimate plan for us is not simple and instant, though. It is not as if you’d stare up in the sky and the answer will just reveal itself to you. It takes conscious diligence and loads of grace from God to uncover the answer. It may take a lifetime search, but it’s the kind of quest that’s worth taking. Rather than journeying alone and clueless, it is more reassuring to go through this life knowing that the hand of the Father is with us, directing us which path to take.<br /><br />When we allow God’s hand to lead us, dealing with difficulties on our jobs becomes a tiny hump in the road that won’t keep us off-track. When we allow God to guide us, misunderstanding and pains in our relationships will be washed away by His immeasurable love and compassion. Nothing in our life is too trivial for Him, for He knows every detail in our life. He knows us more than we know ourselves. So if we feel lost and wonder what living is all about, try to search for Him, and you’re going to get the most wonderful answer there is.</span>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-8193184426255518052007-09-22T00:12:00.001-07:002009-06-21T16:54:56.963-07:00In His Eyes<table id="HB_Mail_Container" height="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0" unselectable="on"><tbody><tr height="100%" unselectable="on" width="100%"><td id="HB_Focus_Element" valign="top" width="100%" background="" height="250" unselectable="off"><p><span style="font-family:verdana;">Chocolate brown skirt. Alas! After sifting through the rack, I thought I must have it. It should be the first skirt I’d ever have in my closet. I hurried to the fitting room and tried it on, which took me a few minutes. The other ladies outside must have already been annoyed, but I couldn’t care less. I simply stared at myself in the mirror, not even attempting to turn around to get a better look. Not an angle could give a better look anyway. I sighed then finally decided to put my jeans back on. I lifted the skirt, disappointed.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">To add up on my excitement-turned-frustration episode, as soon as I stepped out of the fitting room, right in front of me was a tall, slender lady with long hair, wearing a casual white tank top and a flowing floral skirt, fit for the summer. Yeah right, thanks for that one, I thought, then slipped through the pack of all the other girls hurrying for the last day of sale.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Isn’t it exasperating to want something so badly and yet you can’t have it for several reasons you just refuse to accept? This may mirror just a petty incident that all of us face in our daily, should I say struggles, in life. </span></p><p><span style="font-family:verdana;">Most of us crave for things that we believe can make us look good. We follow fashion trends and admire those TV icons wearing some signatures clothes that make us want to look just like them, and we feel bad if we don’t. We set aside a huge deal of our income for something to buy for ourselves: a new pair of shoes, new cocktail dress for “emergency” purposes, new bangles and accessories, or a chocolate brown skirt. We are bombarded by the special services from the medical experts and we fall for all the “you need me” products. But I’ve got news for you, we really don’t.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">And why exactly do we want to look good? To make us feel good about ourselves? To get approval from other people? All for show. We love to see people swooning as we pass by or at least whisper “I love that top, where did she get that?” We stand tall, thinking yeah I’m beautiful.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">And after that, what?<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Does the color of our skin tell the goodness of our thoughts? Does the amount of fat we have suggest what’s inside our hearts? Do the clothes we wear reflect our capability to love and care for other people? Or does the paint we use in our face define who we truly are? I must say, absolutely not. Although our being can never be equaled to what is visible to us, it’s tough to see right through one’s heart, because we are easily deceived by what is seen by our naked eyes.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">The good news is there is someone who would not give even the slightest value on everything physical about us. We may be the fattest creature on earth that we just have bulges everywhere, or we may have the roughest skin that could be mistaken from a pumice stone, but He just wouldn’t care. We may have exaggeratedly active oil glands that produce the worst acne or we may not be able to wear the very style we want, but it’s still not going to get His attention.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">There is a whole lot more in this world that is far more important than what we believe is a life-and-death situation in terms of physical appearance. The top models with the most perfect body do not necessarily mean they are happy. It’s not of this body that defines us. It’s nothing but flesh. And our God is least concerned about the flesh. Let us not overemphasize on what can be seen physically. We are fearfully and wonderfully made by God. We are unique in every way. And God has made us for more meaningful purposes than to just look good.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">A short story mentions an old man who would fit to the word ugly. Yes that’s the word: ugly. Yet, people love him for his genuine and sincere heart, making him the most beautiful person they have ever met. It may sound cliché but it’s true. When I was battling with a skin allergy that led me to the point of hopelessness, I cried out to God and He did comfort me. He knew what I was going through and He showed me mercy. Then a good friend told me: You know what, healing your skin is the least that God can do for you.</span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;"></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">This isn’t just about physical appearance. It’s all about who we are in God’s eyes. We can’t pretend with Him, nor can we deceive Him. Despite the most expensive clothes we wear, we are naked in Him. And I think pleasing my God is more important than placing a show for all these people who know not a single thing about me. I’d rather be the ugliest person on earth, yet the most radiant, beautiful angel in His eyes.</span><br /></p></td></tr><tr unselectable="on" hb_tag="1"><td height="1" unselectable="on" style="font-size:1pt;"><div id="hotbar_promo"><span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:100%;"></span></div></td></tr></tbody></table>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-33401447535151343342007-09-22T00:12:00.000-07:002009-02-01T23:36:49.579-08:00In His Eyes<table id="HB_Mail_Container" height="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0" unselectable="on"><tbody><tr height="100%" unselectable="on" width="100%"><td id="HB_Focus_Element" valign="top" width="100%" background="" height="250" unselectable="off"><p><span style="font-family:verdana;">Chocolate brown skirt. Alas! After sifting through the rack, I thought I must have it. It should be the first skirt I’d ever have in my closet. I hurried to the fitting room and tried it on, which took me a few minutes. The other ladies outside must have already been annoyed, but I couldn’t care less. I simply stared at myself in the mirror, not even attempting to turn around to get a better look. Not an angle could give a better look anyway. I sighed then finally decided to put my jeans back on. I lifted the skirt, disappointed.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">To add up on my excitement-turned-frustration episode, as soon as I stepped out of the fitting room, right in front of me was a tall, slender lady with long hair, wearing a casual white tank top and a flowing floral skirt, fit for the summer. Yeah right, thanks for that one, I thought, then slipped through the pack of all the other girls hurrying for the last day of sale.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Isn’t it exasperating to want something so badly and yet you can’t have it for several reasons you just refuse to accept? This may mirror just a petty incident that all of us face in our daily, should I say struggles, in life. </span></p><p><span style="font-family:verdana;">Most of us crave for things that we believe can make us look good. We follow fashion trends and admire those TV icons wearing some signatures clothes that make us want to look just like them, and we feel bad if we don’t. We set aside a huge deal of our income for something to buy for ourselves: a new pair of shoes, new cocktail dress for “emergency” purposes, new bangles and accessories, or a chocolate brown skirt. We are bombarded by the special services from the medical experts and we fall for all the “you need me” products. But I’ve got news for you, we really don’t.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">And why exactly do we want to look good? To make us feel good about ourselves? To get approval from other people? All for show. We love to see people swooning as we pass by or at least whisper “I love that top, where did she get that?” We stand tall, thinking yeah I’m beautiful.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">And after that, what?<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Does the color of our skin tell the goodness of our thoughts? Does the amount of fat we have suggest what’s inside our hearts? Do the clothes we wear reflect our capability to love and care for other people? Or does the paint we use in our face define who we truly are? I must say, absolutely not. Although our being can never be equaled to what is visible to us, it’s tough to see right through one’s heart, because we are easily deceived by what is seen by our naked eyes.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">The good news is there is someone who would not give even the slightest value on everything physical about us. We may be the fattest creature on earth that we just have bulges everywhere, or we may have the roughest skin that could be mistaken from a pumice stone, but He just wouldn’t care. We may have exaggeratedly active oil glands that produce the worst acne or we may not be able to wear the very style we want, but it’s still not going to get His attention.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">There is a whole lot more in this world that is far more important than what we believe is a life-and-death situation in terms of physical appearance. The top models with the most perfect body do not necessarily mean they are happy. It’s not of this body that defines us. It’s nothing but flesh. And our God is least concerned about the flesh. Let us not overemphasize on what can be seen physically. We are fearfully and wonderfully made by God. We are unique in every way. And God has made us for more meaningful purposes than to just look good.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">A short story mentions an old man who would fit to the word ugly. Yes that’s the word: ugly. Yet, people love him for his genuine and sincere heart, making him the most beautiful person they have ever met. It may sound cliché but it’s true. When I was battling with a skin condition that led me to the point of hopelessness, I cried out to God and He did comfort me. He knew what I was going through and He showed me mercy. Then a good friend told me: You know what, healing your skin is the least that God can do for you.</span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;"></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">This isn’t just about the skin anymore, nor is it about physical appearance. It’s all about who we are in God’s eyes. We can’t pretend with Him, nor can we deceive Him. Despite the most expensive clothes we wear, we are naked in Him. And I think pleasing my God is more important than placing a show for all these people who know not a single thing about me. I’d rather be the ugliest person on earth, yet the most radiant, beautiful angel in His eyes.</span><br /></p></td></tr><tr unselectable="on" hb_tag="1"><td height="1" unselectable="on" style="font-size:1pt;"><div id="hotbar_promo"><span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:100%;"></span></div></td></tr></tbody></table>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825735579844527167.post-68465307309627999482007-09-20T03:29:00.000-07:002009-02-01T23:36:49.579-08:00Only A Dot There<table id="HB_Mail_Container" height="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0" unselectable="on"><tbody><tr height="100%" unselectable="on" width="100%"><td id="HB_Focus_Element" valign="top" width="100%" background="" height="250" unselectable="off"><p><span style="font-family:verdana;">We all go through certain kinds of misery in our life. The feeling of being alone, abandoned, worthless, and hopeless is not uncommon. We think we’ve gone through all possible troubles anyone could ever imagine. We think we’ve just had enough.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Is this all there is in this life? Nothing but pure hardships? We struggle for more than 20 years of our life trying to learn everything needed in order to live. We struggle for another 20 to 30 years finding life’s meaning, trying to jail ourselves in the world we created- work, all sorts of relationships, goals. For the remaining 20 to, luckily, 30 years of our life, we hope to see ourselves content with the fruits of hard work in all those years. It’s funny how we saved up and prepared for these last years of our life, only to spend it trying to struggle from an illness and a new batch of pure hardships. We struggle from another phase of seeking for answers. Have I lived my life well? And in the process, we still end up frustrated, incomplete, empty.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Truly, life is all about sufferings. We live in this sinful world where comfort and happiness are always backed with distress and anguish. We have our own difficulties. We’re not in a battle of comparison of who has endured more of life’s setbacks. We don’t compete for a prize for life’s sufferings that whoever has the most would be rewarded in the end. If so, everybody would pray not for blessings but sufferings.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Consequently, we grumble. We all think we’re not worthy of all the bad things that happen to us. We believe that we’re innocent enough to have to go through life’s challenges. And most often than not, we don’t even consider it a challenge. We deem it a curse inflicted on us only to make us suffer. We complain that life is truly unfair.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Indeed it is. Nobody promised that living this life would be easy. Nobody claimed that the 70, 80 years of our lifetime would be a bed of roses. Yes we have our own difficulties- lost jobs, material insufficiencies, physical disabilities, health concerns, broken relationships- and we find ourselves having all these familiar feeling: alone, abandoned, worthless, hopeless.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">If life is nothing but pure misery, what is there to be hopeful for?<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">We may be experiencing the most terrible agony in life. We may be born with physical handicap, we may have lost our loved ones from a tragic accident, or we may have suffered abuse from other people. In spite of all the seemingly bad luck that happens to us, it can only affect us to the extent that we allow it to. Zooming in to every suffering makes us blind from everything else- things that we ought to be thankful for. It may be a special skill, love and support from friends and family, the fact that we’re still breathing, the fact that each day, we’re given a chance to make our life better.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">It’s not the suffering that matters; it’s how we triumph from it. How, then, do we succeed? Can we make it through if we cling on to something of this world? Certainly not. Only if we learn to fully submit ourselves to that someone greater than all of us that we will be able to embrace life’s miseries. God assured us that no matter what happens, He will never abandon us nor forsake us. Our God is the maker of heaven and earth. He is all powerful and almighty. No problem is big enough for God. He hears us, He listens. He deeply cares for us. Knowing that God is our fortress, would there still be a room for doubt? Would there still be a room for worry? Would there still be a room for fear? Not a chance.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:verdana;">Despite all the bad things happening to us, as if being done to us in purpose, we still have something to rejoice for, to be hopeful for, because in the end of it all, whoever remains in Him, will be welcomed in His kingdom. Isn’t it a great promise? Should we still bug ourselves with the 70, 80 years of our life knowing that as we go to our final sleep, we have a reward that’s far greater than we can ever imagine?</span></p><p><span style="font-family:verdana;">Let us not lose ourselves on our sufferings. In God’s eyes, the bigger picture is far more important than the most depressing thing that we felt, the gravest thing that we endure. Those are in all sense, nothing. Life on earth is no doubt only a dot in eternity. All the pain in this world is nothing but a dust blown away by the loving care of our Father.</span><br /></p></td></tr><tr unselectable="on" hb_tag="1"><td height="1" unselectable="on" style="font-size:1pt;"><div id="hotbar_promo"><span style="font-family:verdana;font-size:100%;"></span></div></td></tr></tbody></table>Ellahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17045472581921344245noreply@blogger.com0